


Coming Apart

by DemelzaTheMer



Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: Another Story (Mystic Messenger), Bad End Jumin, Canon-Typical Violence, Drug-Induced Sex, Hurt/Comfort, Imprisonment, Kidnapping, M/M, Manipulation, Mental Anguish, Porn With Plot, Somnophilia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-07
Updated: 2020-11-10
Packaged: 2021-03-08 17:14:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 2
Words: 18,957
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27440263
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DemelzaTheMer/pseuds/DemelzaTheMer
Summary: When V invites Jumin to the Mint Eye, there’s nothing he could do to prepare himself for what’s about to transpire.
Relationships: Han Jumin/V | Kim Jihyun
Comments: 56
Kudos: 72





	1. Chapter 1

V has entered the chatroom.

V: Hello!  
V: I came in to deliver good news for all.  
V: Everything is going to change, for the better.  
V: Look forward to it.  
V: Is Jumin here?  
V: I guess not.  
V: I have an invitation for you. I’d like to meet you, if you’re not busy?  
V: Let’s meet where I am. It’s been a long time since we’ve had a good talk.  
V: **Please come.**  
V: I’ll send you the coordinates. It should only take a day. Can you make it?  
V: It’s kind of urgent, so I’d like it if you’d come straight away…  
V: I really hope to see you soon.  
V: **I’m waiting for you.**  
V: **DD 55.2853049,22.0987983**

V has left the chatroom.

“Luciel?”

“Yes, thank you. Although Mr. Han doesn’t like it, he agreed to take the bigger of the company’s cars. Several bodyguards will be attending him during the journey.”

“No, he said he won’t take them inside. Have you found anything else about that Mint Eye? Do you think it’s safe?”

“Ah, I understand. I’ll do some research, too.”

“Huh? Yoosung is coming to your place? He must want to help you to watch the security cameras and the satellite footage. It seems he still doesn’t trust V…”

“Okay. If something happens, please call me. Mr. Han left me in charge here, so I might be able to help.”

“Yes. For now…”

“I will be back in 12 hours. If I am not, and haven't contacted the security chief in any way, you can come after me. There shouldn’t be any problem, though. I’m only visiting my friend.”

With those few words, Jumin Han parted from the security guards that were waiting some distance away from the Mint Eye. He wouldn’t need them inside. Usually he’d take only driver Kim with him on a car trip, but because of the atmosphere right now, it didn’t hurt to be cautious.

It was all because of that damn hacker. It’s been twelve days since the messenger app was hacked and MC joined the RFA. She didn’t seem to hold bad intentions, on the contrary she seemed like a wonderful young lady. The only suspicious thing was that she was apparently kidnapped and being held captive by an unknown hacker.

It was taking an awfully long time for Luciel to find out who the hacker really is, which was odd considering his talent. That was one more reason to believe the hacker was a serious threat to RFA.

Yet he hasn't done anything so far besides giving MC an access to the messenger. Therefore right now, the only confirmed threat was to MC’s safety. That was something Jumin couldn’t do anything for before her location was cleared, so he didn’t waste his energy thinking about it too much.

With long strides Jumin walked through the front yard of the Mint Eye. The mansion was huge, and built stealthily in the middle of the mountains. Jumin had a bad premonition about this place, despite V’s invitation. Too many things didn’t add up.

During the four-hour car trip, Jumin had received reports from assistant Kang who was working together with Luciel to find out as much as possible of his destination beforehand. It’d been odd enough for V to send coordinates instead of an address. After hearing the place belonged to a cult, Jumin had a reason to suspect something dubious was going on. Possibly illegal.

Jumin wasn’t one to be prejudiced and his trust for V was concrete. No matter how worried assistant Kang was, he would make his own conclusions only after talking to V. He must have a good reason to associate with a place like this. V has never been a person who’d fall victim to a cult. Jumin would go there and find out the truth himself.

He’d never seen a more curious design for a building before. It resembled a castle more than anything, with white walls, pillars and tall, majestic windows. Its theatrical look was finished with a grand logo above the front doors.

“Mint Eye.” It reminded Jumin of something.

He climbed the few stairs to the front entrance and reached out his hand to knock, when the door was cracked open before him. A young man with white hair smiled at him.

“Welcome, Jumin Han. I’m Ray, your escort. We’re so glad to see you. We’ve been waiting for you.”

Jumin stared at him. He was positive he’d never met this person before, though his face was somehow familiar. The escort was wearing a dressy, magenta suit with flowers on the lapel.

“Where’s V?” Jumin asked. He was in no mood for chit chat.

“He’s inside. Shall we?” Ray smiled again, like he couldn’t contain his happiness. For Jumin, it seemed somehow strange. It was a useless effort anyway, Jumin didn’t care about appearances. He wouldn’t get on his good side just by playing nice.

On guard, Jumin followed Ray inside. The lobby was spacious, with staircases going up to the second floor and down to the basement. There were many other doors, too, but Ray chose a hallway deeper into the building.

There was not a living soul other than them. Ray filled the eerie silence with cheerful small talk, in which he got no response from Jumin. There were rows and rows of doors on either side of the hallway, but all of them were closed. The lights were more dim the further away they got from the lobby’s windows.

“Oh, but before V comes, there’s someone who wants to meet you,” Ray said suddenly.  
Jumin furrowed his brows.

“Do I know that person?” he asked.

He wasn’t happy about the change of plans. He wanted to see V right now. This place was making him uncomfortable, and he needed to give V a talk as soon as he found him.

“Of course! I understood that the Saviour is very dear to you, as well. You’ll be happy to see her…” Ray promised.

Jumin wasn’t convinced, but he reluctantly agreed. It wouldn’t be bad to learn more about this place.

In the heart of the building, hidden behind multiple locks, was a pretty door with vases of flowers on either side of it. Ray smiled.

“We’re here. I’ll let you go in first. The Saviour is waiting for you.”

He picked the last key on his massive key ring and opened the door with a delightful click. Jumin curtly nodded and stepped inside.

He was welcomed with bright, artificial lights that hurt his eyes after the dim corridor. Despite the lack of windows, the spacious room was filled with real flowers and exquisite furniture. In the middle of the room, sitting by a table for two, was a familiar figure Jumin had thought he’d never see again.

“Rika?” his confusion was apparent from his voice. Rika was the least person he’d expected to see here. To see anywhere.

Rika showed him a gentle smile that brought back more memories Jumin knew he had. She was wearing a black dress, a colour she never wore before, and her flowy hair was beautiful as always.

“Hello, Jumin. Are you surprised?” she asked and waved for him to come closer.

Jumin crossed the room to join her around the table. He nodded.

“Surprise would be an understatement. I was informed that you are dead,” he explained.

He had never doubted V for a second in his life. The fact that V had lied to him about something grave like this made his head hurt. There must be an explanation.

Rika laughed.

“V had been fooling you all. He’s full of nothing but lies. I’m so sorry for you,” she sighed with a smile.

“Hm. Where have you been all this time, while we thought you took your own life?” Jumin asked. Rika ignored him and waved for Ray, who was standing by the door.

“Can you be so kind and bring us some tea? I believe this will be a long conversation.”

Ray eagerly nodded and disappeared into one of the apartment’s other rooms. Jumin believed this space held everything needed for living, a contained home inside the castle.  
Rika brought her attention back to him.

“I’ve been here,” she said. “I’ve been building my own little paradise.”

“Then, are you in charge of the cult ‘Mint Eye’ residing in this building?” Jumin asked.

“Don’t say “cult”. It’s nothing like that,” Rika scolded. “What I’ve created is a safe haven for lost souls. To everyone forgotten, mistreated, or unloved. I love them all. This place is a paradise where everyone can be saved, and everyone can attain happiness. I love being in here, and that’s why I wanted to bring you here, too. And eventually, everyone of RFA.”

Jumin took a deep breath.

“I don’t understand what you’re talking about,” he said, voice strained. “No one in RFA is in a need of saving.”

“Oh, but you are! I know all of you, and I know there's pain and sadness in your hearts. I know that deep down, you are a lonely person, Jumin, even though you don’t want to admit it. That’s why I got you Elizabeth,” Rika said.

“But a cat is not enough. You’re not happy with only that, you need more profound happiness. That’s why you’re here!”

Her smile that had once brought peace in Jumin’s mind, now elicited only conflicted emotions. She was the same Rika that lived in his memories, but something has changed. He was afraid it was something irreversible.

Jumin knew Rika’s heart held endless kindness that could embrace anyone, even an unobtainable person like him. But what she was talking about now, has tipped the scale into something else. Her dream had become an obsession, her words were beyond common sense. Jumin thought of ways to persuade her to see a psychiatrist after they’d left this place.

“No,” Jumin said. “I’m here to meet up with V. Do you know where he is?”

Flashes of V’s face crossed Jumin’s mind. V never recovered after Rika’s claimed death. He’d become only more timid as time went on. Jumin didn’t remember the last time he’d seen him. It must have been more than four months ago.

He couldn’t shake off what V had told him after the funeral, that his eye injury was Rika’s doing.

Now Jumin realized that what he’d always thought of was true. Their relationship that he knew was only a surface. There had to be more things that Rika’s done, things V never told to anyone. Jumin knew their egagement had been rocky at times, but he didn’t know the extent of it. He didn’t know anything about this person that was sitting before him now.

“Why do you care about him? He lied to you that I was dead, didn’t he? He lied to the police, and to my family! That’s awful, isn’t it?” Rika asked him.

Her eyes began to glisten with emotion. Jumin carefully nodded. False statement was against the law; the V Jumin knew would never break any rules. He must have been very desperate at the time.

The truth that was unraveling before him shook Jumin to the core.

If only he’d known. If only V had told him, he could’ve helped. But the man was too stubborn, always wanted to take all the burden on himself. The thought of V struggling alone was scary. The scale of this secret was too big, the weight of the consequences too heavy.

“I need to talk with him, Rika,” Jumin said with a serious voice.

“Jumin, you can’t trust him. You don’t know what he’s done to me. He’s done so many awful things,” Rika pleaded.

“I’ll make my judgement only after I’ve talked to him,” Jumin said. He’d never seen Rika behaving so irrationally. He considered her one of his only friends, but now his trust was shattering piece by piece. Rika needed help.

“Are you saying you don’t want to stay with me in my paradise? I can offer you salvation, get rid of all of your pain. All you need to do is say yes. Why would you want to follow V, who has betrayed you?” Rika asked. He reached her hands across the table to grab Jumin’s, but he pulled away from her.

“Perhaps V has betrayed you, I have no way to know that. But V has never betrayed me,” Jumin said firmly.

Rika blinked several times, like she was shocked by Jumin's words. Her beautiful face looked at him full of desperation and sorrow, her lips moved when she whispered:

“I only want to grant you happiness.”

“Rika, it’s a no. And I recommend that you leave with me and V, too. I can get you treatment,” Jumin said.

The vulnerable look was gone. Something dangerous flashed in Rika’s green eyes when she straightened her posture and linked her fingers on the table. As if on cue, Ray emerged from the other room, carrying a tray with a porcelain tea set on it.

“I’m afraid I can’t stay for a cup of tea. I must see V immediately. Could you please tell me, is he in this building, or was the invitation fabricated?” Jumin’s patience was wearing thin.

“Don’t be in such a haste, Jumin dear. Let’s have a cup, when Ray so kindly prepared it for us,” Rika said. “Did you make him our special tea like I ordered, Ray?”

“Of course. Only the best for our precious guest,” Ray told him, smiling from ear to ear.

Jumin let out a heavy sigh. Something was not right with that man, either.

“I’ll have Ray to take you to V after we’ve had our tea,” Rika said, smiling as well.

Persistence was one of her virtues, so it was kind of odd for her to give up so easily. Jumin must study her closely in order to understand her changed personality. He made a mental note to look into it later.

Meanwhile, he shouldn’t be impolite and decline their efforts made for him. He took a sip of his tea and asked:

“Is V aware of what you’re doing? Is he a part of this?”

He shouldn’t have expected a clear answer, because Rika just laughed, happy and airily.

“Oh, that traitor wanted to hinder my plans at any cost. He always swore he’d support my dreams, but when I actually started to help people, he wouldn’t want to have anything to do with it. Only recently I found out that he’d been participating all this time!”

Jumin gulped down half of his tea so they could get going without wasting any more time. It was excessively sweet, something Jumin couldn’t stand.

“So he is here. I wonder why he’s not contacting the RFA very often.”

The bad feeling Jumin had had on the front yard had become a sense of danger by now. He hoped V was okay. He always prepared mentally for the worst in any case, but this time he couldn’t. The situation was too unpredictable. His head was blank of any ideas of the measures he should take to tackle it. Rika’s sudden resurrection had shoved all of his previous plans into chaos.

Only one thing stayed clear in Jumin’s mind. It was V’s safety. He’d come here to see for himself how he was doing, and minute after minute his concerns grew. V had to be okay. He wouldn’t forgive himself if he’d come too late.

Jumin finished his tea and put his cup down with a cling.

“Can we go now?” he asked.

Rika had barely tasted her tea. She smiled warmly and put her cup down as well.

“Of course.”

They ventured back into the dark corridor. Ray was escorting Jumin again, while Rika was left to enjoy her tea in her lavish room. His escort turned every corner with confidence, meanwhile Jumin had a hard time remembering the route where they had come from. The place was so huge and every corner looked the same, it took all of his concentration not to lose his sense of direction.

The route turned out to be a long one. Jumin suspected his escort tried to lead him astray on purpose. He was about to confront Ray when suddenly a wave of dizziness hit him. Jumin stopped abruptly and had to take support of the nearest wall.

Ray stopped to wait for him, but didn’t say anything. Jumin pulled himself together and willed his legs to move and his body to stay upright. However, it didn’t take long for him to falter again. He leaned on the wall, chest heaving with concentration.

“Is something wrong, Mr. Han?” Ray asked with a tone Jumin couldn’t interpret in his hazy state.

“Everything’s alright. Let’s continue,” Jumin said slowly and tested if he could walk despite the dizziness.

It was awfully hot now, too. He hadn’t noticed when he’d started to sweat in his suit, but now the hotness was all he could think about. His head was swimming when he wondered why the heating was so high in this part of the building. If he owned this mansion, he’d order assistant Kang to have a word with the people responsible for it…

“We’re here, Mr. Han,” Ray interrupted his incoherent thoughts. He had stopped beside a door similar to every other door. Jumin didn’t know anymore where they were.

“Everything you need has been provided to you on the nearest table. Make yourself comfortable. I’ll come get you in the morning.” Ray flashed him a smile. “Have a good night.”

He didn’t make any sense. Jumin wasn’t going to stay here overnight. He only wanted to talk to V for a bit and then get out with him as soon as possible. He had no reason to… But before he could open his mouth to inform Ray of his intentions, the heat flashed through his body and everything went black.

V regretted everything. He regretted not stopping Rika when he still had a chance. He regretted not saving Saeran from her. Now he was on a desperate journey to stop Rika from having the RFA as well, so he wouldn’t have any more regrets.

He knew he’d already failed. He hadn’t stopped Rika from involving MC, an innocent person, into this. V wanted to stop the party from happening, but all he had done for it so far was to give it his support, since he feared the consequences. He tried to protect the RFA from Rika, but he tried to protect them from the truth as well. It was getting harder and harder every day.

At least he felt a little better when he read Yoosung’s hateful words towards him. V was fine with shouldering all the blame. If something happened to him, it was better for the RFA to hate him. That way they wouldn’t be sad, like they were when V told them Rika was dead. V would hate to make his friends sad.

Wouldn’t there be an easy way for him to end it all at once? What he needed to say to make Rika listen to him? He would gladly sacrifice himself if that was what she wanted. Why she wasn’t satisfied with that? Before, she said she didn’t want anything more but him…

V let out an agonizing sigh and stretched his arms. The handcuffs rattled against the metallic headboard they’d been attached to. The corner of his left eye stinged, as well as his side where Saeran’s kick had hit him. He knew they would bruise, but he didn’t care anymore. He didn’t have to see anyone who would ask about it.

He wondered if he was even going to get out of here this time.

After V had been found out by Saeran when he’d stepped in to protect MC, he’d been their prisoner. Rika hadn’t come to see him once, even when V knew she knew now where he was.

No, she was the one who gave the orders to Saeran and let him do whatever he wanted with him.

It has been over 24 hours now. After the initial beating, V had been locked up in the darkness of the dungeon until this morning. Saeran had come again and took out all his pent up rage on him. At this point, V agreed with him that it was deserved.

He was part of the reason Saeran had ended up like that. He couldn’t deny it and he wasn’t even trying to. He could take all his punches if it made the boy feel even remotely better. V knew it wasn’t enough to atone for what he’d done, but it was something. The pain felt better than the aimless regret that was suffocating him every minute.

This time, however, Saeran had gotten different orders. After beating him up he’d had a couple of Believers drag V into the apartment on the third floor. For mysterious reasons, there Saeran had stripped him of his shirt and then handcuffed him on the headrest of the bed. After insulting him to his heart’s content, he’d left him there.

It was certainly more comfortable, lying on a bed instead of the cold stone floor, but V was even more anxious. This looked like they were planning something for him, and that couldn’t be anything good.

The apartment was one of the fancy ones, similar to where MC was residing. Luxurious furniture, big window into the garden and your own kitchen and bathroom; the place could easily be mistaken as pleasant as long as you didn’t care that you were completely imprisoned.

In the couple of hours V had been tied up, his arms were becoming numb despite his efforts to stretch them every once in a while. Fear and despair welled inside him as he watched the sun making its journey in the sky. Slowly he grew tired, and the soft bedding encouraged him to doze off a little.

“My plan is truly flawless, do you know that, Ray?”

“I expected Jumin not to accept my invitation right away… He is a highly complex person, and he wants to control everything around him, including his own feelings. He’s convinced the best way to navigate through life is being logical, and detached. He wouldn’t understand my message by thinking like that.”

“But he’s actually weak, and fragile. I pity him so much. He’s fighting all alone, trying to pretend he’s living a life he chose for himself. Right under the surface, he’s lost. All the feelings he’s suppressed since he was a little boy keep piling up and tangling into a big, ugly mess. He desperately needs permission to be who he really is…”

“I’m the only one who can help him with that. That’s why I gave him the drug specifically developed for him. It’ll make him relax. He can finally act on his desires and urges he’s always wanted to.”

“You know, Ray, everyone has an ugly side. No one in this world is completely made of light. No one, absolutely no one can be perfect… That’s why we need to accept and embrace our demons.”

“I’ll make Jumin’s demon come out. He’s always wanted to have someone just for himself. Someone who’s not going to run away. He’s terribly afraid of letting himself feel, because his need to dominate is just so strong. But it’s nothing to be ashamed of! I’ll make him realize that.”

“Yes… V is the perfect person to help me achieve this. He doesn’t deserve a friend like Jumin. The useless bond between them is meant to shatter, before Jumin gets hurt by V’s lies, too.”

“Jumin can let out all his ugly feelings now. He won’t be able to resist that stupid, beautiful face when he’s not able to escape… V can save all his empty words! Nothing he says is going to help him!”

“And afterwards, Jumin will come back to me, looking for absolution only I can grant to him. I’ll take him in with open arms. Then he will be able to understand my words. I will love his demon like I love my own… We’ll be happy here, where we can be ourselves.”

V jolted awake when he heard someone on the door. The dull sound of the lock opening filled him with terror. He blinked his eyes in the warm sunlight; it was evening already.

He expected Saeran or some Believers coming to drag him away again, but to his surprise and shock, it was his old friend who entered the room. The door was pulled closed after him by someone else.

“Jumin! Jumin, what are you doing here? You should leave, quickly!” V cried out in panic.

He was terrified how Rika had got Jumin here when V was gone for only a day. It made him understand just how fragile his resistance was, how powerless he was to stop her. It wasn’t fair, how she chose the things that were most precious to him…

Jumin didn’t answer. He staggered a little and took a hold of the frame of the canopy bed for support.

“Jumin..?” Concern made its way into V’s voice.

Jumin pinched the bridge of his nose and furrowed his brows, eyes closed. Then he straightened his back like he’d just realized where he was. He looked around with indifferent expression until his eyes landed on V.

“Jihyun,” he said, simply.

“Are you okay?” V asked. He rolled his wrists in the shackles, to ease the chafing. “Can you get me free from these?”

Jumin’s eyes were now locked on him. He watched him up and down slowly, with intensity that made cold shivers run down V’s back. He took off his suit jacket and placed it away on a nearest chair in no hurry at all. In front of V's confused stare he tugged at his tie and folded it away as well.

“You’re not yourself. Has something happened? Hey, Jumin, can you hear me?” V’s questions grew more hasty when the bed dipped under Jumin’s weight.

Jumin didn’t seem to hear or he didn’t care about V’s distress. He placed his hands on either side of V’s chest and straddled his thighs so he was completely on top of him.

“D-did they do something to you..?” the question died from V’s lips when suddenly Jumin was lowering his head towards his face.

V turned his head away and squeezed his eyes shut. A shocked gasp escaped when he felt Jumin's lips on his neck.

“Wh-what are you doing? Stop!” he cried out and struggled in his restraints.

Unbothered by his cries, Jumin kissed his bare skin and V shivered when he felt the flicks of tongue. The gentle touch was too much to take after getting used to being beaten.

"Jumin… Please..! Ahh!" Jumin made him moan loudly when he used his teeth.

Jumin raised his head to look at him, his face stolid. V glanced at him from the corner of his eye but couldn’t do anything when he lowered his head again to continue where he left off.

“No… Stop…” V pleaded when Jumin sucked on the skin of his neck, making his way down towards his collarbones.

It was the most horrid feeling, having Jumin doing this to him. V had known him since they were kids, their friendship was something he treasured over anything else. He didn’t want it to end like this.

Jumin wasn’t himself; V was sure there was a drug of some sort in his system, making him lose all control over his actions. He wasn’t thinking straight, and his skin was hot on V’s skin, too.

“What they have done to you..?” V groaned. His whole body trembled when Jumin put his hands on his chest to hold him down as he nibbled on his skin. V closed his eyes as his breathing grew ragged when the sweet pain racked him.

“Jumin, at least don’t… where they’re visible,” he muttered. His cheeks were burning with shame when he pressed the side of his face on the pillow, a sorry attempt to hide it. Would he get his shirt back, it would be too embarrassing to see the hickeys on top of his collar the next day.

Jumin responded by grabbing his chin and turning his head so he could stare at him. Then he gave himself access to dig his teeth in where V’s jaw met his neck. V swallowed his words, he shouldn’t have said anything at all.

When Jumin moved lower on V’s body he struggled again, but he was weak after starving for a day and couldn’t do much. He could only cry out when Jumin got his left nipple on his mouth and sucked hard. V threw his head back and trashed what he could, but Jumin relented only when he wanted to, and then moved to another one.

“M-mind the bruise, please,” V gasped when he felt Jumin's large hands roaming down his sides, groping him hard.

His mouth was dry and he knew sweating wasn’t good when he was already dehydrated. But Jumin’s skin was so hot, V closed his eyes in despair when he felt his arousal grow.

A sob rocked his chest when Jumin bowed down to place the most gentle kiss on the sore spot on his side.

Jumin straightened his back so he was sitting on top of V’s thighs. Savoring the moment, he leaned forward and slid his hands down V’s body while watching him at the same time. His sharp, grey eyes took in every detail, every shiver on V’s skin. He watched when V’s body convulsed into his hands when he pinched his nipples. His chest heaved violently even after Jumin took his hands away.

“Ju..min…” V sighed. His eyelashes fluttered when he tried to clear his vision by blinking.

Jumin sat on top of him and was casually unbuttoning his black vest. He was every bit the same Jumin V had missed all this time. He remembered all the times they had talked for hours into the night; when they had gone on trips with Rika; when they had enjoyed wine together with Elizabeth the 3rd sleeping on V’s lap. All those memories were so precious to him. When everything felt desperate, he thought about those moments of happiness and found the courage to go on.

This was all his fault. He couldn’t protect Jumin, either. V was afraid they could never go back as they were after this. The thought pained him more than any of his physical wounds. He couldn’t forgive himself that he’d let things go to this.

Jumin had taken off his shirt and was folding it when V realized what he was planning to do.

“No…” he whispered, miserable.

Jumin put the neat pile of his shirt and vest away and came back to V, who's pleas grew more agitated.

“No, Jumin, listen to me. I know you don’t want this. Not like this. This isn’t right- Ah!” V gasped in surprise when Jumin grabbed the front of his pants and popped them open.

It eased the pressure on his groin but V wanted none of that. They could still stop. They hadn’t done anything irreversible, if they turned around now, maybe Jumin would be able to forgive him someday…

“Jumin…” His voice was trembling and he hated that. Not now when he had to be calm and persuasive so Jumin would listen to him.

“You know this is not what you want. The Jumin I know, the you who you are when your mind is clear, doesn't want to harm me…”

“I’m not going to harm you,” Jumin said. "I'll make you feel good… So good you'll beg me for more."

V had never heard him talk with that kind of sweet tone of voice. He watched Jumin with mild horror and confused attraction when he took off his trousers on the edge of the bed. He folded them to the pile as well before returning.

“That’s not what I.. ahh.. mean! Jumin, don’t!” V begged and tried to struggle but Jumin pulled his pants off. He was so terribly ashamed of his erection a blush colored his face to the tip of his ears, spreading all the way to his collarbones.

Jumin watched this reaction with great interest, staring at the pale skin turning pink. V felt tingling where the gaze lingered and he squeezed his eyes shut to get away from it. His body twitched when Jumin touched his thigh with his fingertips, drawing aimless lines with a feather-light touch.

“You’re so beautiful like this, Jihyun,” he said.

V sighed and hoped he could cover his face with his hands. He hoped he could grab Jumin’s wrist and make him stop, push him away. His touch tickled, V was feeling all of his strength gradually disappearing.

It was when Jumin’s fingers trailed over his hip bones and pushed under the waistband of his briefs that V’s eyes flew open.

“No, Jumin, please…” he whispered as a last protest. “Can you at least think about it? Just, stop for a moment and think about what you are doing. If you really want to do this. Can you do that for me, Jumin? Please…”

Surprisingly, Jumin listened to him this time. His hands stopped to rest on V’s hips. He locked eyes with him and nodded.

V let out a sigh of relief. His shoulders relaxed and he felt so worn out like he would melt into the mattress. So Jumin still had some common sense left…

Jumin stayed still a little longer. Then he nodded to himself.

“Alright,” he said. Then he pulled V’s briefs off, causing him to cry out.

“What? Why?!”

“I did as you asked,” Jumin said, very matter-of-factly. “I paused, I processed. I'll proceed.”

“You…” V bit his bottom lip and tried to close his legs more when Jumin dropped his underwear to the floor. He was so tired his body had become overly sensitive to every touch.

Jumin put his hands on him again, rubbing his thighs and hips over and over. He was purposely avoiding touching him where he was the most sensitive, and V didn’t know if he was thankful or frustrated. Either way, he wanted to cry. He wanted to get out of this situation, but there was no escape for him.

Jumin held him in his hand and V threw his head back, overwhelmed by the pleasure and the emotions.

“Jumin,” he moaned his name again in his haste, not sure anymore what for.

His pleas fell on deaf ears, Jumin was not a man to be moved by words alone. He’d always been like that, stubborn and confident in his own right and wrong. Those were qualities V had always admired him for; now he saw their negative side. Jumin had a tendency to become blinded with his obsession, like how he treated Elizabeth as the center of the world.

V opened his eyes when Jumin left the bed again. He was wearing silky underwear V knew he preferred for their feel, the passion red ones. Now it felt like a sick coincidence. The outline of an erection was apparent, but Jumin didn’t seem bothered by it.

He looked around the room and headed just out of V’s line of sight to retrieve something. Without any hurry he came back, and fear ran its cold fingers down V’s spine when he saw a condom and a bottle of lube he was carrying.

V didn’t fight back when Jumin grabbed his leg behind the knee and lifted it on his shoulder, then adjusted to sit closer to him between his legs.

“Do you really want to do this..?” V whispered but closed his eyes in defeat already. He had no strength left, his body relaxed in Jumin’s hold.

“Yes,” Jumin said. “Don’t worry. You'll love it.” There were wet sounds when he warmed up the lube in his hands.

“That’s not what I’m… worried about…” V muttered but his voice faded away.

Jumin lifted his other leg in the air, too. The spot where his calves touched Jumin’s shoulders was so warm, V got goosebumps down his body. The cold metal of the handcuffs was digging into his wrists, he felt so helpless his arms over his head.

Jumin’s firm hold was somehow calming, ironically it made V feel safe. He didn’t want it, he kept reminding himself, but it had been so long since anyone had touched him lovingly. He’d had few people in his life whose embrace had made him feel safe, and he couldn’t remember the last time…

Jumin’s finger probed his entrance and V let out a choked sound when he pushed it in.

It was never like this with Rika. V was the one embracing her, and she always told him what to do. She didn’t want to try anything, or lose control. She said she was afraid of what she’d do to him, so she kept her distance. V had been happy to just hold her in his arms, he was satisfied as long as she let him be by her side.

“Relax,” Jumin reminded him when V’s muscles tensed, fighting the intrusion.

Jumin flattened his palm on his abdomen and rubbed gently to help him ease up. V was still biting his lips and turning his head away, so Jumin bent over to place a soft kiss behind his ear.

V shivered. Their chests were almost touching, he longed for that warmth. Jumin continued to kiss him, to distract him from the discomfort as his fingers spread him open.

“Your hair has gotten longer,” Jumin observed.

He was so close V didn’t know where to lay his eyes on. His friend had a chiseled face that attracted many women, but V was sure none of them had ever seen the shape of his lips this close. Those lips pressed a kiss on his cheekbone, and the tenderness of it made V’s chest feel tight.

“I’m afraid you’re not taking care of yourself. I haven’t seen you in so long, and every time I call, you just tell me you’re ‘fine’... I don’t know if I believe you, Jihyun,” Jumin muttered against his skin. He lifted his head to look at him.

“Are your eyes still getting worse? You know I only need one word and I’d get you to a specialist in a matter of hours.”

V didn’t meet his gaze. His hands were curled tight around the bars of the headrest, steadying him. Jumin reached out to push stray locks from his face behind his ear.

“Sto… stop it. D-don’t touch me,” V whispered.

He stubbornly kept his face at the side. He didn’t want to hear Jumin’s kind words when he was doing this to him.

Jumin’s fingers that had been working with a steady rhythm came to a halt. There was only a barely noticeable twitch on Jumin’s eyebrow, but V knew he had fucked up. He should’ve kept his mouth shut, now he’d offended Jumin.

Jumin curled his fingers suddenly and made V’s body jerk. A shout escaped from his lips and he thought he saw stars. Jumin thrusted another finger in without giving him time to adjust and worked him harder and more rougher than before.

V couldn’t keep his voice down, he wailed and trashed trying to get rid of the pain. Jumin used his other hand to push his chest down into the mattress and squeezed his nipple between his fingers.

“I’ll make it up to you. I’ll give you all my attention…” he said while staring down at him.

Jumin’s eyes were showing no compassion whatsoever; his sweet words had been only an attempt to placate him. V knew Jumin was not himself, Jumin would never hurt him, but it was hard to keep it in mind when he scissored his fingers inside to spread him even wider.

It hurt. It hurt so bad but Jumin was relentless, V’s mind was blank when he gasped for air, his body spasming with an overload of nerve impulses. His throat was so dry it hurt, his violated nipples tingled and he was so pitifully hard and desperate for release.

Jumin grabbed his leg that was about to fall off his shoulder and pushed it straight so he could scrape his calf with his teeth. He bit down without breaking eye contact and it was just too much, V was sure he was going to faint. He wished he would.

“You’re ready, aren’t you? Will you let me in?” Jumin asked. He spread the four fingers he had inside and V’s breathing hitched.

“Yes! Yes! If that’s what you want, I’l… I’ll… let you do whatever you desire,” V panted.

Jumin slowed down at that. He removed his fingers and left behind an awful feeling of openness that made V wish he’d put them back. With a sickening mixture of fear and anticipation V watched when Jumin reached down to let himself free from his silky briefs.

He couldn’t tear his gaze away when Jumin leisurely tore open a condom and rolled it on, then turned his attention back at him. V writhed his hips under those hungry eyes, trying to get used to the uncomfortable feeling of being spread open. He didn’t want to think about what would happen next.

“No need to be impatient,” Jumin soothed him.

He inched closer and pushed V’s knees towards his chest, then slid his hands up and down behind his thighs.

“We have the whole night…”

V’s blood turned cold when he felt Jumin’s dick touch him between his legs.

Jumin was quick to appease him. He coaxed V to turn his face towards him by pressing two fingers at the side of his jaw. His dark eyes locked with V’s filled with fear and his thumb slid over his parted lips. V instantly pursed them and looked away, rejecting the gesture.

It was the second time he’d rejected Jumin’s kindness.

Jumin’s hand snaked between V’s legs and grabbed him hard. V keened, a single touch made him see stars after remaining untouched for so long. Jumin used the chance to shove his fingers inside his mouth.

They muffled the sounds tearing out of V’s chest when he pressed his thumb on the sensitive head, rubbing there and smearing precum around. Calmly he watched how it made V’s whole body shake, ignoring how he kicked his legs frantically to make it stop.

The chafed skin of V’s wrists broke when he tugged at his restraints to get free. His throat convulsed around Jumin’s fingers and tears were gathering in the corners of his eyes when he fought the gag reflex. He could’ve bitten down on Jumin’s hand but he would never do that to his friend.

“Now, now,” Jumin scolded. He extracted his fingers and smeared the saliva on V’s lips. “I won’t tease you, if you promise me you’ll behave…”

V was shaking, his chest rising and falling when he tried to catch his breath. He nodded again and again.

“I'll… obey,” he rasped.

Jumin smiled. It was a dark, satisfied smile, an expression V had never seen on his face before.

“Good boy,” he said. “Now you can have your reward.”

Without giving him any time to brace himself, Jumin grabbed V from behind his knees and thrusted into him.

V screamed out from pain and surprise. He threw his head back, his hands held onto the headrest knuckles white. Jumin was wider than his fingers had been and he’d pushed halfway in at one go. V was pleading him to pull out but the pain of being spread open didn’t relent, only got worse. Jumin used his body weight to sink in deeper and V could do anything but tremble at his mercy. He felt every inch he was filled with, slowly, driving him insane with pain and pleasure.

He was reaching deeper and deeper until Jumin was flushed against his ass and V’s head was full of sparks, the sensation so vulnerable and so sickening, something no one had ever made him feel before. For a moment Jumin was staying still and V wondered if he was feeling good, being embraced by him so intimately like this. He tried to catch his breath but the inhale turned into a sob, the feeling of being filled was impossible to take.

He gasped when Jumin started to pull out. Every little movement he made caused V to moan with overwhelming sensitivity and when he thrusted back in with a snap of his hips, V’s vision went white.

“Jumin! Jumin!” He cried out his name as a plea to have mercy, but Jumin just did it again, pulling half-way out before thrusting hard back in.

He lost his self-control more and more as he went, going harder and faster after the first taste. Jumin gritted his teeth and established a rough pace of his liking right away, blatantly ignoring V’s screaming. He wouldn’t slow down even when V broke down in tears and was still calling out his name.

“Jumin! I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I couldn’t protect you! I wanted to keep you safe, but- Ahh! I failed! Please, forgive me!” V sobbed.

He could take anything Jumin would do to him, but he couldn’t bear the feeling of guilt tearing his heart apart. He wanted to save all of his friends from Rika, to keep them out of her grasp, but he couldn’t even do that. He was the only one who could understand Rika, and the only one who could stop her.

Yet he was so weak, so useless, and he’d failed again. It was only fair that he was the one taking Jumin’s impulses, because it was his fault they’ve done this to him. V’s chest burned, he gasped for air and sobbing made it worse.

Jumin was kneeling his back straight, palms pushing V’s knees down and hips thrusting into him relentlessly. V couldn’t see his face through his tears, and it was so lonely, so painful.

“Jumin, Jumin, please, hold me..!” V’s voice broke down and he squeezed his eyes closed, ashamed, as tears rolled down the sides of his face. He couldn’t bear this alone, he wanted to feel warmth, he was so scared.

Jumin leaned forward and placed his forearms on either side of V’s shoulders. His arms and chest enveloped V into their comfort, extinguishing some of his terror.

His brows were furrowed with concentration when he pressed his forehead against V’s. Jumin’s skin was hot against his, and inside of him it was burning.

There was no end to V's tears or apologies falling from his lips. Jumin tilted his head so their noses were touching, then their mouths. He crashed their lips together to take away all the meaningless words V was spewing.

V was gasping against his lips and he crossed his ankles behind Jumin’s back when he tried to close his legs with him between them. He couldn’t see but the sensation of Jumin kissing him was in the forefront of his mind, overpowering everything else. V opened his mouth for Jumin to lick into, to indulge how he pleased. He didn’t try to turn his head away anymore but surrended into the sweetness of being kissed.

His body shook when he got closer to the edge. Jumin was still thrusting into him, hitting his nerves every time and making him lose his mind. V squeezed his eyes shut and his breath got caught in his throat when a white wave of pleasure took over him and forced him to lose control of his body.

Jumin put his arms around him and held on to him tight through it all. He pushed in hard, as deep as he could and stayed still. Jumin’s face was pressed on V’s shoulder so he couldn’t see the expression he had, but he could feel him inside when he came. Jumin’s spine was faintly trembling and the pain spreding from V’s shoulder made him vaguely aware that Jumin had sunk his teeth in.

They stayed like that a few seconds more, then Jumin relaxed his hold around him. Tears were streaming silently from the corners of V’s eyes, his cum smeared on both of their abdomens. Carefully Jumin straightened his back and pulled out.

V was aching all over, he couldn’t move his body. Last tremors traveled down his skin and made him shiver. He couldn’t open his eyes for a while, only waited for his heart to calm down and chest to stop hurting with every broken sob. The ecstasy was still rushing through his veins and mingling with the signals of pain, overwhelming all of his senses.

The bed creaked when Jumin got off. He walked to a nearby stand to grab a tissue and wipe himself down. In front of V’s half-lidded eyes, he took off the used condom, tied it up and dropped it in the bin, then fixed his underwear.

Jumin was coming back to V when suddenly he staggered. He swayed heavily to the side but regained his balance before tripping. When he straightened his back again, he looked confused.

He glanced down on his own half-naked body, then around the room when he noticed V, still chained on the bed. His eyes widened in shock.

“Jihyun..!” he gasped.

V wanted to laugh, but only a raspy, choked sound came out. Looked like Jumin finally regained his senses. Maybe the drug left his system along with sweat, speeding up his recovery.

Though V was happy to have him back, suddenly he was terribly aware of how he looked. He had no idea what to say, how to make the situation any better. He couldn’t even move.

The first thing first, as expected from Jumin, he approached the head of the bed to take a look at the handcuffs. Before he got there, however, he turned around like he’d remembered something.

Hurrying he retrieved a small key from the same table he’d found the other supplies. V let out a sigh of relief when his arms were finally free to fall down, though they were so numb he couldn’t lift them.

“Thank you, Jumin,” he tried to say, but could only whisper.

Jumin looked at him up and down with that worried crease between his brows, probably trying to locate where he was hurt. Considerate, he threw a sheet over V’s lower body.

“I’ll get you some water,” he muttered and glanced around the apartment before heading into the kitchen.

V watched his back and could finally breathe easily. All the terror he’d felt earlier was gone, he’d gotten Jumin back. His mind tried to remind him about the hardships that were waiting for them behind the door, but he was too tired to worry about it now.

He relaxed into the mattress but the blissful fatigue was disrupted with continuous signals of pain and aching. V didn’t mind it. He’d gotten used to his breaking heart, no physical pain could ever top that.

It was more relieving, to know that he’d gotten a part of his punishment. He wondered if he let Rika hurt him some more, would he someday be atoned for his sins.

Jumin came back with a glass of water and a first-aid kit. V’s hazy mind wondered what he needed that for, before he realized his wrists were bleeding.

Jumin offered the glass to him and V tried to sit up but a sharp pain stabbed his hips. He hissed and fell back down, chest heaving. He was still useless without being able to lift his arms.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered and lowered his eyes. Jumin shook his head firmly.

“It’s my fault,” he said.

Jumin’s emotions rarely showed up on his face, but after years of watching him, V could see how pained he was. He looked lost, afraid and guilty, all for V's sake. V wished Jumin wouldn’t think like that. It wasn’t his fault, it was the drug given to him.

“I don’t blame you,” V said, but Jumin didn’t hear his weak voice.

He grabbed the pillows from the bed and helped them behind V’s back, so he could elevate his body into a somewhat sitting position.

Jumin brought the glass to his lips and tilted carefully. V struggled to swallow and some of the water slid down his chin and dropped to his chest. Jumin didn’t say anything. V drank the whole glass eagerly, fresh water felt good on his tongue.

“Give me your hands,” Jumin asked after he’d put the glass on the nightstand.

He’d found antiseptic and gauze from the first-aid kit and wanted to treat his wounds. V was positive Jumin had never done it before, but maybe he could let him try.

He tried to lift his arms and give his hands to Jumin who was sitting on the edge of the bed next to him, but his effort was fruitless. V bit down his bottom lip in frustration. The muscles shook but that was it.

He exhaled and was about to apologize again, when Jumin took his limp arm and pulled V's hand to his lap. Jumin grasped his fingers inside his palm and wiped the antiseptic around his wrist with his other hand. It stinged a little, but V didn’t complain. Jumin was a bit clumsy at it, too, but it made his effort even more endearing.

“You really don’t have to,” V said and felt like smiling, though it didn’t reach his face.

“I’ve been worrying about you,” Jumin said and glanced at his face before turning his attention back to his work. “But I trusted you when you said you were fine. That everything was fine.”

A flash of fear hurled V’s mind back into the alarmed state. Nothing indicated that Jumin had met Rika, but if he had and the secret was out… V tried to gather his thoughts to possibly save the situation without letting Jumin know everything, but it was useless as he didn’t know how much Jumin already knew. He couldn’t interpret his tone either, if it was regret or blame. V hoped for the latter; that he could take.

Jumin didn’t say anything more. He rolled gauze around each wrist and secured them carefully so it wouldn’t come loose.

Secretly, V enjoyed the warmth of Jumin’s hands around his own cold fingers. Jumin’s touch was gentle. He handled him like he was fragile, about to break.

“Jumin, are you angry?” V asked. The silence was making him nervous. It was easier to speak now, when his throat wasn’t feeling like sandpaper.

“We’ll talk later. Let’s take a shower first,” Jumin said, lowering his gaze. He was still holding V’s hands.

V then knew his suspicions were true.

Jumin was always sincere with him. He shared his thoughts without bothering to hide anything. V knew he had hurt Jumin’s feelings many times when he couldn’t return the gesture, but Jumin never told him that. He trusted V.

That trust was gone now. V saw that in the way Jumin wouldn’t meet his eyes. He had something to say, many painful questions to ask. He had met Rika. Only talking with Rika could make him doubt V and expose him as the liar he was. Now Jumin knew not to trust him anymore.

“Can you stand?” Jumin asked. 

V blinked and tried to focus on the present moment. His brain was so groggy, it was hard to stay awake. He pursed his lips. He couldn’t sit up without pain, and he wasn’t sure if he felt his toes. He could shift his legs a little, but he knew he wouldn’t be able to walk.

The face he was making was enough of an answer to Jumin.

“Wait just a moment,” he said and stood up.

V couldn’t do anything anyway, so he watched when Jumin disappeared into the bathroom. Soon he heard the water running. V leaned on the pillows and closed his eyes.

While Jumin drew him a bath, V thought about how he could protect him. He thought about how many hours they likely had before Saeran would come back, and what could he do then. There wasn’t a lot.

His heart was tearing at the thought of Jumin in Rika’s hands, what else she could do to him. Though Jumin was mentally strong, Rika had ways to get under his skin; she would be able to break him eventually. V would do anything to keep him away from her.

He woke up at the arms wrapping around his shoulders and under his knees. He yelped when Jumin hoisted him up.

“Jumin..!” V begged and moved his trembling arms around Jumin’s neck to hold on to him.

He was sure Jumin wouldn’t be able to carry him. They had similar builds, and V was as tall as him.

“Calm down,” Jumin said.

His arms were surprisingly strong and he moved steady towards the bathroom. V had clearly underestimated him.

Maybe in his mind, he still mixed up the Jumin he knew from their school years, who was lean and boyish. Even when his personality had barely changed, something else had. Jumin was a lot stronger now, and as stubborn and confident as ever. V had no options but to submit to his will.

Maybe Jumin had grown up while he was gone. Maybe he didn’t need his protection at all.

A blush appeared on V’s ears and collarbones again. It was terribly embarrassing to be princess-carried like this. Not feeling the ground under his feet was alarming, but Jumin’s arms were reliable, and he had no problem taking him to the bathroom.

Jumin began to lower V into the water but couldn’t bend much while holding him, so V tried to help him by supporting himself with his arms on the sides of the bathtub. Jumin didn’t want to just drop him uncontrollably, but with V’s legs paralyzed, it was hard not to. The splash they managed to cause rendered Jumin just as wet as V was in the tub.

V intended to immediately lean back as sitting up made him cringe with pain, but his powerless arms couldn’t take on his weight, either. Jumin watched his struggle to find a comfortable position and then simply stripped out of his underwear.

“Hold on, I’ll help you,” he said.

“No, you don’t have… oh,” V said before he realized Jumin was stepping in the bath with him.

He couldn’t help but give Jumin room when he sat behind him and positioned his legs on either side of him.

“Lean on me,” Jumin encouraged and pulled him into his chest by grabbing him by shoulder.

V squirmed but Jumin was right, leaning back eased the pain on his lower half. It was very awkward, though. The last time they took a bath together was when they were kids, and that had happened only a few times too.

“Isn’t it too troublesome..?” V asked, his ears red.

Jumin’s chest was warm, it felt so good leaning on him but V couldn’t let himself relax. He still tried to support his own weight the best he could.

“It’s not,” Jumin said. “It’s easier to wash you like this.”

“I- I can do that my-” V began to say before Jumin interrupted him.

“No, you can’t. You can’t even hold up your arms.”

The truth was, V was relieved. After the last few months, his mind was on its breaking point. He was physically more than exhausted, and the ordeal he’d been through today had left him raw and aching, both figurative and literally. The warm water that enveloped him and the invitation to relax made it hard to fight the sleepiness.

V twitched when Jumin slid his hands under his arms to rub clean his stomach and chest. Though the touch was amiable and mindful V couldn’t help his body tensing. He tried to keep his breathing calm but it was impossible to get used to Jumin’s hands roaming his body.

Jumin turned his head and pressed his face into mint-colored hair.

“I’m sorry, Jihyun,” V heard him whisper.

Somehow those small words held all Jumin’s feelings at once. His sincerity, his sorrow, his regret. V couldn’t see his face from that angle, but he understood just from his voice. Jumin never wanted this to happen, either. He genuinely regretted his actions. He genuinely cared about V and didn’t want to make him uncomfortable.

The worst thing was, V knew all of that.

He knew it all along and that was the exact reason he never wanted Jumin to get tangled into this mess. If Jumin knew all the things V’s been suffering from, he would never have a peace of mind again. V would hate to make him worry or put him in danger, as he’d most certainly want to help and involve himself.

But now the fight was lost and Jumin was here, imprisoned with him. V’s worst fear had come true and he had a lot to explain and apologize for. Nothing would be the same anymore. There was nothing V could do anymore…

It was so scary to let everything go. He'd fought alone for so long, only for all of his efforts to end up futile. Now V had to let Jumin help, whether or not he wanted to. His will was breaking down along with his body, and he was so scared and so relieved at the same time.

He was thankful Jumin couldn't see him cry from that angle.

The thoughts were too heavy for V’s state of mind. Along with the tears fell all the tension from his body. V dozed off against Jumin’s chest while he washed his hair for him.

He was dragged into consciousness again when Jumin shook his shoulder. He wanted V to sit up so he could slip out of the bath. It was uncomfortable but he endured it for a moment, then let Jumin help him up. His legs were useless so Jumin carried him back into the room. He lowered V on a sofa and fetched him a towel to dry himself.

V woke up from his shallow dream a couple of hours later. His head hurt and he felt awful, but that had become the norm by now. Sleeping any more wouldn’t help him feel better so he opened his eyes.

It was early, judging by the cool light behind the window. Jumin wasn’t by his side anymore, and V found himself missing his warmth already. Regret and nausea attacked him immediately, clenching his throat and making it hard to breathe. He shouldn’t be thinking about his best friend like that. Not after everything he’d involved him in.

There was a sweet smell in the air. It was something that didn’t fit in with V’s experiences in Mint Eye.

He lay there, staring at the ceiling, too worn out to move when Jumin appeared from the kitchen. He had a spatula in hand and was wearing a pink apron. It was obviously not meant for him at all. There was a heart-shaped patch in front. V stared at him, so confused he forgot to laugh.

“Oh, you’re awake,” Jumin said. “Perfect timing. Just a minute.”

He disappeared again around the corner. V blinked and took in a deep breath. The pieces started to come together in his tired mind. Judging by the smell, Jumin was making pancakes.

He used to do that as a hobby some time ago, maybe before Elizabeth the 3rd. It had been too long since the last time V had been nominated to be his taste tester in the quest of making a perfect batter. V hoped Jumin had gotten better since then.

Thinking about those times raised a hint of a smile on V’s face. When Jumin came back, carrying a bed tray with a pile of pancakes on it, the smile became real.

V found his arm strength restored enough he could drag himself into more of a sitting position. Jumin lay the tray down on the foot of the bed to help put a pillow behind his back. When he was comfortable, V raised a hand on his face to cover up his smile.

Jumin pulled open the string holding the apron and put it away.

“Are you laughing?” he asked when he sat down on a chair beside the bed.

V lowered his hand and his shoulders shook with a chuckle, though it sounded more like a sob. He was still wearing his gentle smile when the tears gathered in his eyes spilled over when he blinked.

“Oh,” V breathed and wiped his cheek with the back of his hand. “This is embarrassing.”

Jumin stood up and went to get him a tissue. He shook his head when he sat back down and offered it to V.

“Don’t worry about it. I’ve seen you cry before,” he said, meaning all those times when they were kids.

V had been a sensitive child. He’d cried from the smallest of things, like when he scraped his knee, they found a dead frog or just out of empathy when someone else was crying.

Both of them remembered it well, but when Jumin averted his eyes in regret, V knew he’d realized his words could be disinterpret in the context of last night. 

V didn’t mind. He was more ashamed of himself, wiping his face and trying to stop the tears from coming, failing miserably.

He hated how fragile he felt. He’d always been able to keep it together but in the morning everything was just too much. It felt unreal, to be blessed with a moment like this, having a breakfast with Jumin. Things like that didn’t happen anymore. Not to him. It felt comfortable, therefore undeserved. Jumin made him feel like everything was okay again, when V knew that was impossible.

“Do you want some?” Jumin asked, thoughtfully ignoring his tears.

“Yes, please. Thank you, Jumin,” V said, showing him a trembling smile.

Jumin lifted the bed tray in front of V and took the second plate on it to himself. He’d gotten him a glass of water, too, but otherwise the breakfast was plain.

“How did you make these?” V asked. He’d realized how hungry he was, and nothing would’ve tasted more heavenly right now than Jumin’s pancakes. He didn’t want to think about how long it’d been since he last ate.

“There’s some food supplies in the kitchen,” Jumin told him. He could’ve eaten by the table, but wanted to accompany V, so he was balancing his plate on his lap. “Not much, but luckily enough to make pancakes.”

“You’ve gotten better,” V praised. Jumin hummed in a nonchalant manner.

“This is not… the first attempt,” he said modestly.

Now when V thought about it, he did smell something burnt in the air, too. He would’ve liked to see the kitchen. For a meticulous person, Jumin could cause a huge mess when he tried to cook.

A chuckle made its way out of his chest again, this time without tears. After getting something to eat he wasn’t feeling nearly as awful anymore. He saw Jumin exhale and relax his shoulders. He’d been worried.

The strained air between them stayed, but eased up a bit. V didn’t want to think about anything else. If only the constant ache in his body wouldn’t have been such a persistent reminder of what had happened not many hours ago.

He had noticed it after Jumin had taken off the apron, but didn’t know how to bring it up. Jumin had dressed in his clothes from yesterday, but had only his jacket on.

“Umm… Where’s your shirt?” V finally asked when curiosity got the better of him.

The suit jacket without a shirt underneath exposed a generous view on Jumin’s chest. The whole look was oddly sensual on him, V tried his best not to stare too much.

“I thought you could wear it,” Jumin said. “You don’t have your own. The wardrobe is filled with women’s clothes, too.”

They finished eating and Jumin took the dishes back to the kitchen. He returned with the said shirt and handed it to V.

Seeing its thin, grey stripes aroused sadness in him again. V mourned for all the mundane things he’d treasured that were now mixed with conflicted emotions. He’d taken too many things for granted. Now he realized how much he was about to lose, or had already lost. With shaky fingers V pulled the fabric on his shoulders.

Dressing up made him aware of the marks on his skin. Countless hickeys covered his neck and chest where Jumin had implemented them. V’s cheeks burned when he looked down on himself, he was grateful there weren’t any mirrors near. Buttoning the shirt up hid a lot of them, but V could feel the slight ache under his jawbone, on top of the collar. Jumin looked away, too.

“The door isn’t locked. I suggest we take our leave as soon as possible,” he said. “Even if we’re stopped, you don’t have to worry about a thing. It’ll be seven o’clock soon.”

“I entered the premises around seven p.m. last night,” Jumin explained. “My team is waiting nearby. They have my order to come retrieve me if I haven’t returned in twelve hours. If only there were range, I’d call them to pick us up right away, though…”

“You have a phone?” V gasped, surprised. Jumin gave him an odd look.

“Yes, but as I said, it’s useless when we’re out of range…”

V nodded. He moved his legs bit by bit to the edge of the bed until he could put his feet down. They weren’t as numb anymore, but the ache on his lower back was terrible. One attempt to stand up was enough to conclude his legs were still unsteady.

After V had dressed up, they were ready to leave. Jumin wanted to give him his shoes, too, but V refused. Jumin would need them more when he had to support V.

V wrapped an arm around his shoulders and on three, they stood up. He tried his best to walk, but his legs trembled from effort. Jumin’s steady arm around his waist stopped him from tripping.

It felt incredibly humiliating to rely so heavily on someone else. Jumin had always offered his help, but V was so used to doing things alone he hadn’t even thought about accepting it. What it had led to was this position now, with V causing Jumin more trouble than ever.

V hung his head and bit his lip when he struggled not to lean all of his weight on Jumin.

When they approached the door, faint noises could be heard on the other side. Before they could do anything, a metallic click indicated someone locked them in. V let out a deep exhale and felt his heart sink in desperation. He shouldn’t have imagined they had hope.

Jumin’s comforting presence had made him forget about Rika for a moment. It didn’t change the fact their lives were still in her grasp. There was no escape from her.

Jumin used his free hand to test the handle, then banged on the door.

“What’s the meaning of this? We are leaving, now,” he raised his voice so whoever was on the other side could hear. He appeared calm and collected even in a situation like this, but V felt how he tightened his hold around him.

“I’m sorry, Mr. Han, but only you are allowed to leave.”

Ray’s voice came from the other side of the door. It was muffled like he had something on his face but it couldn’t be mistaken. Jumin took a deep breath.

“I’ll be leaving with V. That’s not up for discussion.”

V was afraid of the icy fury Jumin could call forth; he knew what it could do.

There was a long pause. V wondered if Saeran was instructed by Rika on what to do in case they can’t get what they want. He tried to think what it would be and prepare for the worst, when he heard a small whistling sound.

There was a pillow of faintly white smoke coming from under the door.

“Don’t breathe-!” V gasped and shut his mouth, but it was too late.

The smoke spread rapidly and Jumin, taken by surprise, had already inhaled. It took only a couple of seconds before he faltered and it was V who had to catch him.

He shielded Jumin’s head in his arms when he collapsed on the floor, taking V with him. He couldn’t cushion the fall and hit his tailbone but succeeded in keeping Jumin safe. The white hot pain radiating on his back took his breath away, but after a few seconds it eased enough for V to function.

“Jumin?” he called, brushing hair away from his face.

Jumin had been knocked out instantly. Thank god, he was breathing, but he didn’t stir when V pinched his cheek. He’d fallen on his back, his head against V’s chest. The pain made the position unbearable so V lay Jumin on the floor and rolled over. He wanted to keep his head low in case the chemical was still floating in the air.

He’d been aware of the Mint Eye’s use of sleeping gas in handling troublesome Believers, but never witnessed it in action. Now he was shaking with anger; that drug was way too potent, it could be dangerous!

V rested his forehead on the ground, afraid to breathe but desperately needing to. His hand was on top of Jumin’s bare chest, making sure his heart kept beating.

After a minute or so, the door cracked open. Saeran was standing there with two Believers wearing their heavy cloaks. They all had masks on, Saeran wearing black fabric over his nose and mouth. Despite it V could see how he sneered when their eyes met. They stepped in with an intent.

“Please don’t take him,” V begged.

He was on the floor in an awkward crawling position, next to unconscious Jumin. His fingers curled around the lapel of his suit jacket, holding on even though he knew he couldn’t stop them.

Saeran stomped over and kicked V hard on the stomach, eliciting a sharp cry from him. He curled up with tears in his eyes. The Believers walked on both sides of Jumin and picked up his lifeless body, then started dragging him away. V could see his face through the tears, but Jumin’s closed eyelids didn’t even twitch.

“You’re pitiful,” Saeran spat out.

He didn’t pass the chance to kick V again as they were leaving. He glared at him with eyes full of rage and made a show of slamming the door shut. The click of the key and waning footsteps were the last things V heard before silence fell into the room once again.

For a long, agonizing moment V hugged his sides and just breathed in and out slowly. Finally his heart calmed down and the pain subdued a bit. His own thoughts harassed him more than Saeran could ever manage, blaming him for everything.

V took it all in and accepted it wholly. The anguish felt worse than all of his physical pains combined. If only he could reverse everything. If only Rika was satisfied with him, V would’ve given up his life a thousand times for Jumin.

If only they took him, not Jumin. Anything else, but not Jumin.

V would give Rika his eyes, his arms and legs, his heart and soul, if only she’d leave Jumin alone. The pain in his heart clenched around his ribcage and made his breathing hitch. V reminded himself of the slow breaths and eventually calmed down again.

Wallowing in self-pity wasn’t going to help Jumin. V forced his arms to move and lifted his upper body off the ground. Sitting up was out of the question, but maybe he could draw his legs closer and shift his weight on them. After trying and failing, V resorted to crawl on all fours. If he wasn’t completely wrong, he was in the room with a view towards the east.

There was a convenient little window seat where V could rest. If he was facing the window, the security camera wouldn’t be seeing what he was doing. They could think he was just lamenting his miserable life with his head down.

Under the waistband of his pants, V pulled out Jumin’s cell phone. He’d taken it from Jumin’s breast pocket when he was on the ground, before Saeran came in with the Believers.

It was a matter of minutes. When they’d find him out, it was game over. With shaking hands V pressed in Jumin’s password. It hadn’t changed after all these years. There in the middle of his home screen was the RFA messenger. V’s heartbeat picked up the pace when he watched the app loading.

That is, until the connection was broken. He was out of range. Even though he’d learned by trial and error that the east corner of the building and the garden underneath had the best chance to connect with mobile devices. He was still too far.

Desperation welling inside his chest V thought through all of his choices. There were not many, and the clock was ticking.

06.29: 707, Jaehee Kang, ZEN

ZEN: So the trust fund kid is back??

Jaehee Kang: Mint Eye released Mr. Han a little while ago, but he’s unconscious…

ZEN: What, why???  
ZEN: What did they do to him?

Jaehee Kang: We don’t know. We’re only able to monitor the place from outside with the satellite camera.  
Jaehee Kang: He’s rushed to the hospital as we speak.  
Jaehee Kang: I hope it’s nothing serious…

ZEN: How can it NOT be serious?? He was normal when he went in!  
ZEN: And what about V? Do you know anything?

Jaehee Kang: The intelligence unit works nonstop, but I’m afraid we don’t have much to tell. We can’t even confirm if V’s in the building or not.  
Jaehee Kang: The hacker might have used his phone to access the messenger yesterday.  
Jaehee Kang: We can’t do anything but wait for Mr. Han to wake up.  
Jaehee Kang: I wonder if I can take a nap…

ZEN: That’s a good idea. Let’s take it easy for now  
ZEN: The danger is over

707: Yooooo, are you still watching??  
707: The satellite live! The spying eye on top of the mystery building! Something is happening~

ZEN: What even  
ZEN: Spill it out

707: Someone just broke a window on the third floor by throwing a paperweight  
707: From inside  
707: **A HUGE crash!!!**  
707: **WAIT**  
707: **Is that V???**  
707: He’s reaching outside with something on hand

Jumin Han has entered the chatroom.

Jumin Han: ..---...  
Jumin Han: **S**  
Jumin Han: **O**  
Jumin Han: **S**  
Jumin Han: -...

Jumin Han has left the chatroom.


	2. Chapter 2

18.58: Jumin Han, MC

MC: It's a beautiful evening. I was gone for only a week, but it feels nice to be back home.  
MC: Jumin, you’re here!  
MC: Please tell me that V’s doing better...

Jumin Han: There’s not much to tell. He's still unconscious.  
Jumin Han: I'm afraid he won't wake up until tomorrow.

MC: I see… He's lucky to have a friend like you.  
MC: Take care of him for us, okay?

Jumin Han: I will.

MC: I didn't get to know V very well, but he was still worried about me. He got caught when he tried to protect me.  
MC: I feel sad that he's the one who suffered the most in the end. Thanks to him, I got out of there without a scratch.  
MC: V saved me.  
MC: When he wakes up, I want to thank him in person.

Jumin Han: I'm sure he'll appreciate it.

MC: Thank you too, Jumin!  
MC: I know it must not have been easy to find out the truth.   
MC: You were brave.

Jumin Han: Thank you.  
Jumin Han: Personally, I feel… I haven't done anything that deserves praise.

Twelve hours later the RFA was in shambles. The incident shocked them to the core, shaking their whole foundation. Rika had been alive all along. She’d created a cult full of terror and inhuman practices in her belief of helping people. Before the law she was a criminal, in her own world a benefactor.

V had faked her death, committing a crime himself by lying to the authorities. He’d been lying through his teeth to the RFA as well, people he called his friends. They were confused, worried, enraged, disappointed - rightfully so. Their trust in V was shattered.

After Jumin woke up, suffering no other consequences from the drug than a slight headache, he took the situation into his own hands. A large operation was called to raid the building, their mission to rescue V at all cost.

Another purpose was to collect evidence against Mint Eye. Jumin wanted to drag into light every last piece of information he could, to expose all of Rika's wrongdoings and present them in the court.

In the midst of it all 707 found out that MC and the hacker who'd introduced her to the messenger were involved as well. The mission now had two persons to be rescued, all the others were to be captured.

When the troops stormed in, Ray locked himself in the control room. As he watched his whole world collapsing, he took his handgun and threatened to shoot himself. After a struggle they managed to disarm him and took him into custody along with the others.

Rika couldn't be found anywhere; she must have escaped alone.

As a conclusion to the mystery of her whereabouts, MC was found safe and sound in one of the luxury apartments within the building. She was evacuated promptly and returned into her own home, but she was still keeping contact with everyone via the RFA messenger.

As an insider she could answer to many of the RFAs pressing questions about Rika, the hacker and their life inside Mint Eye. More of a human perspective apart from classified findings of the law enforcement.

It took the rescuers an hour before V was found in a secret basement. He was shackled and locked up in the darkness. It looked like he’d been given a drug of some sort, causing him intense pain. He was sweating excessively and shivering at the same time, muttering incoherent words like he was high with a fever.

Jumin was there when they rushed V to the hospital. He sat beside him in the ambulance, listening to his cardiogram’s rapid beeping. V's hand in his was cold.

Nothing else mattered at that point. Jumin turned off his phone, leaving the investigation and collecting of evidence to assistant Kang and Luciel. They were experts in their own ways so he didn't worry.

V’s condition had been dire when first attended to in the ambulance. Without immediate care he could’ve died from a heart attack caused by the overdose or suffer a permanent brain damage.

He woke up in the hospital two hours later. Much to Jumin’s agony, he hadn’t been able to conversate or even recognize his friend’s face, instead suffering hallucinations and bouts of anxiety.

In the evening, Jumin requested V to be moved into a more comfortable, private room inside the hospital. His state had stabilized enough that he didn’t need urgent care, so there weren’t any nurses present. They told Jumin it’d take another twelve hours for the drug to wear off completely, but he was going to be okay.

It had been a long day. Jumin entered the room and closed the door softly. The space wasn’t big, but it had a sofa and other furniture that normal hospital rooms didn’t have. Jumin wanted V to be comfortable when he woke up. Though it was a small thing, Jumin didn’t like the sterile white decor -or lack of it- hospitals had.

There was a set of curtains separating the bed from the rest of the room, creating its own small space of privacy. The one in front of the window was left open, but the others covered the sight towards the door. Coming closer, Jumin could hear V faintly moaning.

He pushed the curtain aside and stepped in, letting it fall back in place behind his back. V had been sleeping since the last fit of incoherent rambling an hour ago. He’d calmed down for a while, but Jumin could tell he was getting agitated again. His breathing was shallow and his eyes were moving under his eyelids. V’s heart was beating fast when Jumin rested his hand on his chest.

It was unfortunate. Under his calm behavior and logical acting, Jumin was experiencing a whirlpool of emotions. Every now and then, when he wasn’t careful, his hands would start trembling with slight tremors because of the rage taking over his whole body. Jumin felt his throat clogging and his vision turning hazy. He’d never been so infuriated in his life.

Jumin was mad at the people who’d done this to V. At Rika who’d driven V to go into such desperate lengths, and at himself for not intervening. He hated himself for not noticing the signs, for walking straight into Rika’s trap and most of all, for hurting V. Jumin knew he could never forgive any of the parties who’d contributed to V’s torment.

In addition to anger there was sorrow and deep regret. Jumin’s heart ached when he watched over V’s agony.

With a sigh he sat down on the chair beside the bed. The only thing he could do was to stay by V’s side and make sure he was as comfortable as possible until it was over.

There were no other sounds in the room but the ticking of a clock and V’s ragged breathing.

When Jumin touched his cheek his skin was hot, almost feverish.

The doctor had said it was a normal symptom and all Jumin could do was to try aid cooling him down. He’d already removed all the covers, but V’s body temperature showed no signs of decreasing.

There was a wash basin with a cloth on the side table, Jumin squeezed extra water out and wiped the sweat from V’s forehead.

It’d been so long since Jumin had spent this much time with V. It was unfortunate their reunion had to happen in circumstances like these.

Jumin could feel the ugly feelings raising their heads again. He couldn’t stop thinking he should’ve intervened sooner, he should’ve saved V from this horrible experience. It was hard to stay calm, even though getting mad didn’t solve anything.

“I won’t let anyone harm you ever again,” Jumin swore under his breath. His gaze was fixed on V’s face, he knew he couldn’t hear him. “I promise.”

V let out a sigh in his sleep. His eyelids were moving ever so slightly and his brow twitched. He looked like he was having a nightmare, or a vivid fever dream.

Jumin brushed his fingers down the side of his face in a soothing motion. V looked somehow younger in the hospital pajamas, and so frail. Jumin’s hand trailed on his shoulder and down his arm, to cover V’s hand that had clenched into a fist.

He wished V could sleep peacefully. He wanted nothing more than to see him calm, not in pain.

Jumin took the damp cloth and wiped V’s skin again where drops of sweat had formed. He reached to the collar of his shirt and popped the top buttons open as well.

V’s skin was glistening, red marks covered his neck and collarbones. More bruises came into view the lower Jumin unbuttoned V’s shirt. He had to face his own faults when he wiped down V’s chest as gently as possible, trying to avoid putting pressure on the marks. V moaned quietly but otherwise didn’t stir.

Moving lower, Jumin noticed another thing adding to V’s restlessness. He was hard. It wasn’t surprising, the drug was still messing up his system and heating him up. However, he was in no condition to take care of it on his own at the moment.

Jumin watched his chest rising and falling with every gasping breath.

It wasn’t good for him to be so worked up.

Jumin put the rag aside. Ever so gently, he lowered his hand until his palm was resting on top of V's clothed hardness. He watched his face for a reaction but there was none until he moved his hand.

V was way too defenseless, way too beautiful. Was that why all the bad things kept happening to him, Jumin thought. He couldn’t know, but he knew it was at the root of his own dark feelings.

It was wrong. It was so very wrong, particularly after all that had happened. The glaring red marks covering V’s exposed chest were a very real reminder of that.

Yet Jumin didn't take his hand away.

Suddenly a bizarre calmness took over him. He stared at V's sleeping face, how unassuming he was, how clueless. The feelings that’d been running rampant inside of him quieted down, all second thoughts vanished.

There was no one else in the room. At this moment, V was his, completely and utterly.

It was the last time he would ever be.

Agonizingly slow Jumin rubbed his hand up and down the shape under the fabric. The little gasps and moans that fell from V's lips were so sweet in his ears. The satisfaction it made him feel was so great he shivered.

Jumin wanted to give him more. He could help him.

V hadn't stirred. At a leisurely place, Jumin's hand moved up to caress his stomach. V's body started to tremble, maybe it tickled. Though it was adorable, Jumin had something else in mind.

His fingers brushed along the waistband of V's pants before sliding under.

When Jumin reached to touch him bare, V’s breathing hitched. Feeling invincible, Jumin didn't stop.

Before yesterday, he'd never had a chance like this, to touch him so intimately. He'd wanted to, craved to, for a long time. He hadn't seen V naked since they were teens so he'd had to resort to the power of his imagination.

Not once or twice had Jumin stared at V from across the room, undressing him in his mind. How delicate he would look, how lovely his bare skin would feel under his hands.

Getting to live the dream gave Jumin immense pleasure. He unzipped his own pants to release the pressure that was building up.

When Jumin wrapped his fingers around V's length, his head lulled to the side and he groaned. Encouraged by this reaction, Jumin stroked him with his thumb. The shape of him fit so perfectly into his palm it made Jumin smile.

He waited until the slight softness on his palm became full-on hardness, then gently freed V from his pants.

A shiver ran through V’s body, causing him to twitch. Jumin rubbed him up and down at a steady pace now, far too gone to stop. He made sure his grip was loose to avoid overwhelming him.

There was no need for V to wake up.

Impatient, Jumin used his other hand to turn V’s head back to face him. It wasn't worth it if he couldn't see his face.

V had such a beautiful face. His brows were slightly furrowed, beads of sweat had gathered there. His lips were parted in such an erotic manner. The little mewls and moans that he let out were so cute Jumin chuckled under his breath.

He loved the quiet sounds but in his ears he remembered a whole other range of sounds he'd dragged out of V.

Jumin remembered everything. At the time, it'd felt like a dream, like he was making it up in his head. He had very vivid dreams of V sometimes. In that state he hadn’t been able to differentiate reality from them and so he hadn't seen any reason to hold back either.

Though his feelings of regret and sadness didn’t agree, Jumin's body remembered it’d felt amazing. It was a conflicted state his head was in, between the reason and the longing.

One thing was sure. He could never feel it again.

Jumin knew V well enough he could predict V was going to forgive him. He was like that, always putting his own feelings last.

But if he knew Jumin was still watching him with the same kind of longing, he wouldn't be able to ever think of him as the same. There was no going back to being friends.

Nothing was ever going to be the same. It was Jumin's fault, the fault of years-long pining that got out of his control.

This was the last chance he had to pour all of his affection onto V. The last time he could ever touch him.

Jumin pushed his hand into V's hair to graze his scalp with his nails. The moan V let out was particularly sweet. When Jumin clenched his fingers he got a fistful of mint-colored hair. He didn’t pull at it, only tested how it would feel before letting go.

Every little part of V was adorable. Jumin loved him through and through, down to his stubborn habits and low self-esteem. To him, no woman had ever been as beautiful as V.

Carefully, Jumin lowered his hand off the bed and worked to unclasp his belt. He took himself into his hand while he used the other one to caress V. Soon he used the same pace with both hands.

Whatever he did to himself he did to V; when he heard V gasp alongside his own wave of pleasure it almost felt like they were doing it together.

V was panting hard now. His whole body was trembling and his moans got louder when he was verging on the height. His hands were shaking but they stayed useless on his sides. Jumin thought about how they’d look tied there, with red silk ribbon to the metal bars on the sides of the hospital bed.

Chasing even greater pleasure, Jumin added more pressure into his grip. V pushed his head back and groaned when his body convulsed at Jumin’s mercy.

Jumin's fervent gaze was glued on V's face when he jerked himself. He couldn’t get enough of V's expressions, the blush that spread rapidly down his chest, the helpless gasps that fell from his lips whenever Jumin changed the angle he touched him.

It was all too good. Seeing him like that spurred Jumin on, he wanted to give him even more stimulation before he'd come. His own breathing was getting ragged, too. He got up on his feet and leaned over V, bringing their faces close.

He watched the pretty, pink lips up close and wanted to seal them with his own.

V's lips were still bruised after Jumin's selfishness last time, how he'd bitten and sucked on them. He wanted to do it again and the want was like a blazing fire inside of him, but he knew V couldn't wake up. 

“Nnh..! Aah!” V cried out. The muscles on his hips flexed and relaxed again in a desperate attempt to get off, but the relief was Jumin’s to grant.

Jumin pushed their foreheads together on impulse. V's skin was hot, his breathing shaky. They were so close Jumin could feel it on his face, he drank up every sound from V's lips with unquenchable thirst. Closer, he wanted to get closer still.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, shaking while forcing himself not to kiss him, to push his tongue in his mouth and steal his breath away.

He couldn't kiss V. Jumin reminded himself that he was doing this to help V lose the edge of his restlessness, nothing more.

Jumin gritted his teeth and grimaced. No matter how he wanted to pleasure V as a lover, he couldn’t fool himself with his fantasies and forget the reality. No matter how he wanted to kiss V, he shouldn’t.

V was shaking now, his whole body writhing desperately. He was so close he'd come even if Jumin stopped and only waited for the stimulation to push him over the edge. But Jumin wanted to grant him what he seeked with his own hands.

He teased the tip of V’s hardness with his fingertips, watching him keenly all the while before pressing sharply down with his fingernails.

V's cries were cut short. His muscles tensed and his mouth was hanging open when violent shivers ravaged his body. Jumin stroked him hard when he came, shooting all over his stomach and chest.

Jumin came seconds later. Witnessing that beautiful undoing was the last straw to make him snap.

He was coming down from it, his head swimming with euphoria when he heard V grasping for words.

“Ahh… Ju… min, ” V moaned between his ragged breaths.

Jumin snapped his head up to stare at V in shock. His heart stopped at the thought that V had woken up, but his eyes were still closed. It didn't look like he was awake. He must have been dreaming.

For a few minutes Jumin leaned on the edge of the bed, anxiously waiting for V to show signs of consciousness. Gradually V's breathing calmed down until he was resting still, deep in slumber. He looked much more comfortable than before.

Jumin let out a deep sigh. He wondered what V could be dreaming about.

He waited for a moment more but V uttered no more words. Jumin stood up, fixed his clothing and visited the bathroom to wash his hands. When he came back, V was sleeping peacefully. Jumin wiped down his body with the cloth, buttoned up his shirt and placed the cover on top of him.

After that he just sat there in silence, contemplating everything. It was hard to figure out the actions he should take when V woke up and was back on his feet.

There wasn’t much he could do to make any of this better.

05.31: Jaehee Kang, Jumin Han

Jumin Han: I’d like a status report of the current situation.

Jaehee Kang: The law enforcement has successfully caught Rika. The investigation is still ongoing, but so far there're at least several felonies she’s accused of.

Jumin Han: That’s good to hear.  
Jumin Han: She won’t be able to cause any more damage. Anything else?

Jaehee Kang: A lot of illegal substances were found inside of Mint Eye. I guess they will be added to the list of Rika’s charges.  
Jaehee Kang: The hacker, “Ray”, has been transferred into a physiatric institution after he tried to harm himself in custody.  
Jaehee Kang: How’s V?

Jumin Han: Still sleeping, but stable. You don’t have to worry about him.  
Jumin Han: I won’t leave his side.

Jaehee Kang: I’m glad to hear that.  
Jaehee Kang: That’s why, Mr. Han… Can I go to sleep?

ZEN has entered the chatroom.

ZEN: Good Morning~  
ZEN: I woke up early today and thought about going for a run!  
ZEN: The sunrise is so beautiful! It’s a perfect day!  
ZEN: But what’s with this gloomy atmosphere here..?  
ZEN: Jaehee, don’t tell me he’s made you work all night?!

Jaehee Kang: Ha… haha… That seems to be… my fate.

ZEN: Yo trust fund kid! What are you thinking?! She’s not a robot!  
ZEN: You should really consider someone else’s feelings for a change!  
ZEN: Hey, are you listening???

Jumin Han: He’s waking up.  
Jumin Han: I need to go.

Jumin Han has left the chatroom.

Jumin put his phone down and turned his attention to V, who’d raised his hand to rub his eyes. The curtain was drawn over the window to shield him from direct sunlight, but the insistent rays of light brightened up the room nevertheless.

V blinked his eyes until they focused. Jumin waited nervously when they landed on him, but the earlier hazy look was gone and V was himself again.

“Jumin, you’re okay..?” V whispered, his voice was still weak. “Where are we?”

“In the hospital. Everything's okay now,” Jumin said. He watched V’s hand grip the covers on his lap and wanted to reach out and hold it instead.

Jumin was sure he wasn't the person V wanted to see when he first woke up. V was loyal and kind but during these last days Jumin had understood that V’s real thoughts were a mystery to him.

He’d wanted to believe he was worth V's trust; now he didn’t know anymore. Anything V said was just the surface of all of the things he kept to himself.

V let out a sigh and closed his eyes again.

“Saeran… the elixir… I thought I was going to die,” he muttered.

“What happened?” he opened his eyes and turned his head to Jumin.

V tried to sit up but Jumin stopped him with a hand on his chest. He pressed a button and with a low whirring sound half of the bed rose into a sitting position.

“Mint Eye is over. There’s no one here anymore. I assume you knew about MC all along - she’s safe now. The police will handle Rika and the rest of this mess,” Jumin told him with a quiet voice. “There’s nothing you need to worry about.”

“How long has it been..? I feel like I’ve been asleep for weeks,” V said hoarsely.

He looked much better now, compared to last night. He was leaning on the mattress, the soft light caressing his face that was tilted towards Jumin. He raised his hand and pushed a strand of hair behind his ear, a gesture that filled Jumin with so much adoration he felt an ache in his chest.

“You don’t remember anything before now?” Jumin asked. V shook his head.

“I blacked out in the cellar… and I woke up here,” he said.

Jumin recalled the last 15 hours he’d worried beside delirious V without a wink of sleep. He was glad V had been saved from remembering that experience.

There were things he was better off not knowing.

The doctor was called to do a final examination on V. The drug had left his system and he had no side effects so he was discharged without delay. Jumin thought about sending him home but leaving him alone in the apartment full of Rika’s pictures didn’t feel right.

In the end it was V who asked to stay with Jumin for the time being.

The penthouse didn’t feel as empty and quiet with V in there. Elizabeth the 3rd was happy to see him, too.

The moment V sat down on the sofa she hurled to throw herself on his lap to receive all of his attention. She never did that to any other person.

Jumin found himself feeling a bit jealous but he didn’t know of who.

He was aware that the RFA messenger was going wild all day. Instead of trying to keep up he turned off his phone again. If assistant Kang needed him enough, she’d come to his door.

V’s phone had been destroyed by someone in the Mint Eye so he was blissfully oblivious to the chaos. Jumin wanted to keep it that way.

In his last message Jumin prohibited the members of the RFA from visiting. V didn’t need them to distress him with their questions at the moment.

It was the first time in two years Jumin got to spend time alone together with V like this. He knew it was going to be the last time, too.

That's why no one could come in and ruin it for him.

They talked a lot all day, about anything but Mint Eye. Jumin’s business trips, Elizabeth the 3rd, the past and the future of V’s photography. They enjoyed dinner together with wine of the best vintage. All the while the happy cat purred on V’s lap.

When he petted her, Jumin noted, his hands weren’t trembling anymore.

Yet the unavoidable topic hung over their heads like a heavy cloud, ready to let the downpour fall.

After the dishes were taken away, Jumin was pacing in the kitchen. Today had been such a blessing he shouldn’t be greedy for more. If everything went south, at least he got one day with V when it had felt like they were back in the old times. It had to be enough.

The conversation could no longer be delayed.

Bracing himself for the upcoming loss, Jumin stepped into the living room. He saw V’s mint-colored head above the backrest of the sofa and approached him with heavy feet.

V raised his eyes to meet him but instead of sitting down beside him, Jumin stopped to stand in front of the window wall. The darkness outside and the shining lights of the city behind him shrouded his face in shadows.

“Jihyun,” he said. “We need to talk.”

V didn’t say anything. He already knew.

For a moment today he’d looked relaxed, but the fatigue had settled on his face again. The eyes that sparkled when he laughed had lost their light. Maybe it was the external trauma, maybe the internal, but his eyes looked more dim and foggy than before. The bottomless sadness in them was something Jumin hadn’t picked up before.

“I’m sorry for what I did. I’m not asking you to forgive me. I know words alone will never be enough of an atonement.”

There was a long pause. For the first time in his life, Jumin was at a loss of what to say.

“I want you to know that I deeply regret it. If I could undone everything, I would do it for your sake,” he whispered. “I never wanted to hurt you.”

V let Elizabeth the 3rd down, who slipped off into another room. He shook his head gently.

"It's okay, Jumin. You don't have to apologize. You weren't yourself… It was the drug. It's not your fault."

V’s voice was soft but he didn’t meet Jumin’s eyes. He tried to smile but it didn’t convince either of them.

"No," Jumin said. "That's not all…"

He had to let V know. Jumin lowered his gaze.

"I never wanted you to find out like this," he said. He was painfully aware of V's innocent eyes looking at him, waiting for him to continue.

"The drug was only effective in removing my self-control. It didn't make me do things that I… didn't want to do." Jumin grimaced realizing those words could be easily misunderstood. He quickly continued.

"If they’d pushed me into a room with anyone else tied up like that… It wouldn't have happened. It was only possible because it was you. I don't know how Rika picked that up from me."

"She knows we're close, right?" V said, trying to make sense of Jumin's words but missing the point altogether.

Jumin's heart sank. He wasn't ready to speak these words. This conversation was something he'd wished would never happen.

It was too late now. He had to finish what he started. At least he wanted V to understand what had overcome him. To understand why he did the things he did.

"It's not that simple." Jumin breathed in and let the air out slowly. "What I mean is… I didn't do anything I hadn't… imagined before."

Jumin was able to pick up the exact moment V's eyes went wide when the implication of those words sank in.

"Oh," he breathed.

"That's why you need to let me apologize. Maybe to you, it would've been simple to brush it aside as an accident. However, now you know the damage is more devastating. I understand if you don't want to see me anymore," Jumin said.

His voice was cold as well as his expression. It seemed the more his feelings raged, the colder his demeanor became. It was impossible for him to express the tangled mess inside, the way his chest hurt and made it hard to breathe. Jumin couldn't feel his fingertips. He stood still like stone, waiting for V's reaction.

V sat quiet for a moment, staring at the floor.

"I don't understand," he whispered. He raised his head to look at Jumin.

"Are you telling me it's simply lust? You fancy me-"

"I love you," Jumin cut in. "I love you, Jihyun. More than a friend. More than I ever wanted to admit. It's different from what I've ever felt towards anyone."

That was not how he'd imagined he'd say it. There was no grace in the words that tumbled out. His true feelings flooded out without the careful filter he always had in place.

"I love you… so much that it scares me."

"Jumin…" V whispered. That one word conjured more pain within than a stab in the chest.

Jumin couldn't bear to look at V when he stood up and slowly approached him. He didn't want to see his face, if V's expression was filled with disgust and rejection. He was feeling lightheaded thinking that this was the end. This was the moment he’d lose him forever.

"Why are you apologizing for loving me?" V asked. His voice was so soft it took Jumin's breath away.

"I did something terrible to you. That's not the way I wanted to cherish you," Jumin managed to mutter despite the choking pressure in his throat.

"It was not your fault," V repeated. "Besides, that's still a way… to cherish me. I'm not hung up on it. I'm not angry, Jumin. I forgive you."

He glanced at Jumin quickly under his overgrown bangs. He lowered his chin and Jumin stared at the teeth that flicked over his bottom lip before he gathered the courage to say what he was about to.

"You can cherish me in other ways, too, from now on."

It was a whisper but to Jumin he could've shouted it, the effect was the same.

“If you’ll have me.”

Jumin snatched V's hands into his own, making him blink in surprise. The coolness of his skin, the shape of his long fingers was the most comforting thing Jumin knew.

Nothing else has ever felt more like home than having V by his side. Jumin gave his hands a squeeze and V raised his chin to receive his passionate gaze.

"I won't let you down. I promise," Jumin said.

The smile on V’s lips was still weak, but it was sincere. He let out a sigh and his shoulders slumped. When his knees gave in, Jumin was there to catch him.

Like he weighed nothing, Jumin scooped him up and carried him back to the sofa. This time V didn't yelp but hold onto him tenderly.

Jumin let him down and kneeled in front of him on the floor. He was still processing what he'd heard. He wondered if this was another dream. It was simply too good to be true.

But the person in front of him was real. When Jumin placed his hand on the sofa next to V's knees, he took it and held it. V leaned forward towards him and his hair hung in front of his face.

"I'll be broken for so long," he whispered. "I- I can't even give you an answer."

There was desperation in the way he squeezed Jumin's hand like he was scared to let go.

Jumin was baffled that V thought that mattered at all. He was more than happy to wait for an answer, when he had pined for V for years already.

This time he even had a chance.

"I don't care about that," Jumin said. He felt out of breath with the feelings filling up his chest.

"I don't know if I have a right to dream about the future," V said. He sounded so lost and fearful, Jumin wanted to wrap his arms around him and hold him.

"I don't know if I deserve a second chance. I messed up, Jumin. I don't even know what love means."

He closed his eyes, exhausted. Jumin let him rest his forehead against his own. He counted every time V breathed in and out, shallow.

"But while I figured that out," V whispered after a long silence.

"I'd feel better if I could… remain by your side."

Jumin took V's head into his hands and combed the hair out of his face. He met those beautiful, scarred eyes, only inches between them.

"What do you think about my feelings?" he asked.

"I don't mind," V said. "I trust you."

Jumin let himself relax, first time in two days. He pressed a kiss on V's forehead.

"Are you sure I'm not making you uncomfortable?" He had to make sure. V nodded. 

"What I feel now is… relief. With you I feel at peace, like all my worries are far away. You're making me feel…"

V wrapped his arms around Jumin's neck. He latched onto him and buried his face next to his ear. Jumin found himself enveloped in his scent, the scent he missed when he was alone, one he used to long for so.

Soft hair tickled his face when V whispered softly:

"...Safe."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **~Normal Ending~**
> 
> This was the fastest I've ever written a chapter and it's thanks to all your love<3 Thank you from the bottom of my heart for the lovely comments, I hope you liked the second part too!
> 
> I loved writing this and now I'm kind of thinking what would a **Good Ending** be, where V and Jumin overcome together the trauma from the first chapter and live happily ever after ...or a **Bad Ending** because as we all know, V is just as M as Jumin is an S.
> 
> Let me know what you think!! What was your favorite detail of the story?  
> I'm happy to know I'm not the only one who's madly in love with JuminV<3 Please come talk to me @ solmareninjas in Twitter, I'm just a lonely writer hornee for 2D husbandos


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